We know the phrase Hamish and Andy, but they actually do go solo! Hamish Blake talked to me about dancing in gay clubs, kissing men and his new gig in the world of Lego!
Can you explain your role on Lego Masters?
Hamish Blake: I’m not a judge, thank god. I’m there as a consumer level, and even parent level Lego fan. I’ve played with Lego since I was a kid and now as a dad I’ve spent many afternoons building things with my son. I love the creativity. I’m there to direct traffic through the show, with the challenges and the contestants. But I then handover to ‘The Brickman’, who is an actual Lego expert and judge.
The Brickman! Sounds like a Pulp Fiction character.
Yeah! He has a real name, but I don’t want to say it! I didn’t know what he’d be like and I thought if he’s a Lego Master, we’d be coming from different worlds, but he’s the loveliest regular guy. When we’re not filming we talk about cricket and footy. I came to realise his skill is just like any artist. He’s a perfect mix of engineering and creativity.
Along with Andy Lee you’ve done quite a few TV shows. Are there any standout moments?
For us, the perfect moment is where something unexpected happens and we are genuinely laughing. Once we went to a bar in Japan where they had monkeys as waiters. We weren’t expecting that…I mean those monkeys were very good, but just seeing a monkey running up to you and putting a beer on the table, well it just really got us. We were in tears!
Of all the people you’ve come to interview and meet, has there been anyone special?
I can’t go past Tom Hanks. There’s all that worry about meeting a hero and they could turn out to be a jerk, but he turned out to be the greatest guy of all time. He was an absolute legend, and exactly as you’d hope Tom Hanks to be. Folksy, charming, and with a lot of time for everyone in the room.
Hamish Blake, host of Lego Masters
Tell us about Pink. She actually tattooed your arm?
Yes, she had carte blanche to do whatever she wanted, tattoo-wise. I thought she’d do a dick and balls, but the frog on a skateboard was something she’d draw when growing up, and now it’s with me forever. She tattooed it before going on stage and during the concert said “This is not going to make sense to anyone else, but I forgot to tell you Hamish, don’t go in the shower with it for twenty four hours!” So I had a personalized message in front of 25 thousand people at Rod Laver! That’s how good Pink is, she can stop her show for skin care!
You don’t seem to be afraid of dares. Have you ever pashed a bloke?
Yes, many times. I remember kissing our radio panel operator Cacklin’ Jack on air, just to give him his first bloke kiss.
Who’s your best gay mate?
I’ve got a few and I don’t want to offend anyone. It’s a dead heat between my mates Josh and PK. I couldn’t split them because they’re both terrific guys.
You must have been to a few gay clubs in your time?
Yes, and I’m the worst dancer, but always embraced with open arms. The thing is, I go in as the worst dancer, leave as the worst dancer, but always pick up some moves. My big problem is that I’ve only got a two dance maximum, because I have a thermostat problem where I overheat. So I have two dances on and two off to avoid a saturation mess! If I do three on, I’ll never cool down for the rest of the night. Maybe I should go to gay clubs more often, because then I could dance in my undies and be rid of my thermostat issues!
So what song will get you onto the dance floor?
Dancing Queen! Would you believe we actually did a gig the other night with Bjorn Again! So, last weekend I danced to a solid ABBA set!
“They made me get changed into a full-cheek Speedo!”
Has anyone ever come out to you?
Not directly, but growing up in the Eighties I had mates who we knew were gay, but we’d never had that conversation. So it was never like ‘Guys, I’ve got to tell you something’. Luckily I grew up in an era where they felt comfortable enough to just come out on their own terms in a gradual process.
Hamish Blake on the set of Channel Nine’s Lego Masters
So who would you turn gay for?
That’s not a hard question, because there are some crackers out there! I’d be a Tom Hardy guy! My wife will read this and say that I’ve done this to annoy her, because she would leave me for Tom Hardy. So it’d be like a double dagger to her. You’ve lost your husband and Tom Hardy’s now off the table!
You won a Gold Logie in 2012, but also the Fugly Award for Spunkiest Male TV Personality in 2008. That one must feel pretty special?
Oh yes, that was much bigger! That’s why if you look closely at my Gold Logie acceptance speech I’m like, oh well, once you’ve climbed Mount Everest, you can’t be that excited about Kosciuszko.
And seriously, a Gold Logie. That must be pretty awesome!
I think like anyone who goes through that experience, it’s very flattering, but you also have to keep it in perspective. It’s a slow-horse race so technically you can win with the majority of 21 percent. It would be a mistake to think it was unanimous. I think I was very lucky to be there that year!
Who’s your diva?
Lady Gaga! Even pre A Star Is Born, that Netflix doco where she’s getting ready for the Super bowl, is unbelievable. I think I’m unashamedly now one of Gaga’s Monsters. It took me a while to come to the party, but I think she’s fairly amazing. That doco tipped me over, and so did the Beyoncé doco.
Hamish chats with contestants on Channel Nine’s Lego Masters
You’ve done nudie runs, a naked restaurant and dressed in women’s bathers, but a New York bodybuilding contest?
Yes, I wanted to wear a G-string. I thought in bodybuilding they wear G-strings all the time, but this was like a family-friendly body-building contest! They made me get changed into a full-cheek Speedo! I’ve also done tones of cross-dressing, in fact last weekend Andy and I were hosting a carnivale-themed event, and when we got our outfits we said “Where’s the pants?” It turned out what we thought were necklaces were the dresses! I was glad we were wearing undies, because at first I thought we would be freeballing it!
“I should go to gay clubs more often, because I could dance in my undies and be rid of my thermostat issues!”
Have you ever had a wardrobe malfunction?
Many times! In women’s clothes particularly, where I’m sure I’ve shown people way too much. I also went through a bit of a festive rotund stage in the US, and I refused to believe I was gaining weight. I split a lot of pants and popped a lot of buttons in that era, and the deafening noise of splitting seams is what led me to believe I might have gained weight in America!
Briefs, fitted boxers or freeballs?
I’m a fitted boxers man. One thing that frustrates me is not having enough undies or socks. So every now and again I’ll do an audit of my undies draw. I’ll throw them all out and buy like thirty pairs of the same. This stops you having favourites. So throw out all the old and start from scratch! You have to be brutal and just let them go. It’s liberating, because you have twenty or so on a new even footing.
You also have a new show coming called Perfect Holiday?
Yes, it’s me and Andy travelling around making each other do dumb shit. We’re literally doing it because we missed travelling, and making Channel Nine pay for our holidays. It’s kind of our happy place, and something we were doing before we were on TV or radio. We’d take weird road trips back in uni, and we’re excited to still be doing it twenty years later.
Meeting up with the great Hamish Blake!
LEGO Masters, from 28 April on Nine.
Hamish & Andy’s Perfect Holiday will air later in the year.
