Currently touring with Dead Set Country comedy, Lawrence Mooney answers some candid everyday questions.
The state of my hair is …
A very full, bouncy salt-and-pepper pompadour, and it’s fabulous – or it’s mussed dirty country.
The state of my heart is …
Full, though I live with a constant gnawing fear that this ride is going to end, but that’s the true joy of life. It’s infinite.
The state of my undies drawer is …
Immaculate! It always was and always will be. My undies are graded through favourites to emergency, but they all get rotated. Only one brand – Calvin Klein.
The best accessory I ever bought is …
My Omega Speedmaster. I didn’t think I was a watch guy, but sometimes I kiss it and thank it. It’s closely followed by my Ferris 40hp ride-on mower.
The most famous person I’ve met is …
Richard E. Grant, whom I introduced myself to at Waterloo station, London. I know, leave the poor guy alone. We discussed Uncle Monty (Withnail and I), and he indulged my impersonation.
Back in high school, I was …
The class clown. I was competing to be accepted by the alpha peer group, and I was hopeless at sport. I had no other choice.
The best thing about stand-up comedy is …
Making a room full of people laugh at the same thing at the same time. What a privilege.
The worst thing about stand-up comedy is …
Having to wait all day to do it and avoiding the pitfalls of boredom, followed by the pre-gig mind freakout. But having endured all that, it’s the best feeling – it’s like flying.
I feel sad when …
I see another dead wombat or kangaroo. Fuck me! Slow down cunts!
I’m shit scared of …
Aggressive pissed men, and liver cancer.
People don’t know that I once …
Got accepted into the Royal Australian Navy but decided against it. Isn’t there a song there?
When alone in my car, I …
Listen to road noise or just cry at songs.
If you want to make my blood boil, start talking about …
Some other fucking comedian’s career success. Fuck off!
My best on-stage stuff-up was when …
I mocked a table of Commonwealth Bank Executives at a Financial Advisor’s year-end celebration. They had just been named and shamed in a Banking Royal Commission. I said, “Congratulations on a year of hard work and great performances, except the CBA – you guys fully shat the financial bed. Where are you shmucks?” There was muffled laughter, then stony silence from 500 people.
My secret food indulgence is …
A bag of hot cinnamon doughnuts, anywhere, anytime. Well, it used to be, but now it’s a post-gig kebab with the lot. What a mess.
My favourite all-time television character is …
Captain Hawkeye Pierce on MASH. He introduced me to martinis and flirting.
The song that makes me smile and want to dance is …
Pump up the Jam, by Technotronic. There’s no competition. Because that’s where the party’s at and you find out if you do dat.
The song I can never get out of my head is …
Shelter from the Storm – Bob Dylan.
My gay mates are …
Amongst the funniest people I know. I love the irreverence and the caustic delights they come out with. But it’s not all laughter. They also have an accentuated empathy and compassion. Is it innate or a product of the struggle?
For more on Lawrence’s Dead Set Country tour visit: alist.com.au/tours
